So, I have been busting to write something about this COVID situation. I wanted it to be useful, maybe even meaningful. As each day passed, I was thinking, things are getting better, restrictions are lifting, what is there to write about now?
Not about how to deal with home-schooling your kids
Photo byMartin SanchezonUnsplash
Not about anxiety coping strategies
Or things to do at home in isolation away from friends and family
What strikes me now is its time to take stock.
Pause to reach into ourselves to ask - what now? Is it possible to take a global disaster, disaster on a scale too unimaginable to process, and take something hopeful forward?
I catch myself sometimes, in recent days, feeling hopeful, or even thankful for these circumstances. I have to tell you that I also get a strong sense of shame and embarrassment. I am scared to admit that I feel OK about all of this. Why? Because…
Millions are suffering, scared and fearful
Thousands have lost loved ones
Death
Destruction
Mass Graves
Tears
Pain
And I am thankful? What’s that all about? I want to make it clear that I have been deeply impacted by recent events, it’s just that I use this one simple yet powerful idea to help me get through. I’ll share it with you in the hope that it is useful, even meaningful to you.
One simple yet powerful idea...
Gratitude. Pure and simple. We have been socially programmed to be thankful for something we have received from another, maybe a service, a gift, or a favour. Even to say “thank you” to people for things for which we actually didn’t want or ask for or else be labelled ‘rude’ or ‘ungrateful’.
Image from Shutterstock
I’m not talking about that sort of gratitude.
I’m talking about the kind of thanks that sits inside of me ready to activate a positive appreciation at any moment. It’s about developing an internal ‘noticing’ of feeling thankful. An intentional radar, switched on 24/7, that searches for the tiniest shimmer of wonder.
Noticing, appreciating its wonder and then acknowledging that split second moment. Wow! Amazing!
What am I on about? I’ll share one experience with you to tell you how I use gratitude.
In the morning, I’ll be walking my gorgeous dog. Now stop right there because I am immediately so thankful that she is out walking with me as she is old and arthritic. If she is out walking with me, I am thankful for our precious time together and cherish our snails pace wander of the street.
Because I’m walking so slowly…
I’ll notice the bees flying from flower to flower searching for their food, I’ll watch them going about their job oblivious of the world around them in crisis. I’ll notice the piles of dried brown leaves in the gutter and purposely crunch my feet along, appreciating the feeling underfoot and laughing at how childish I am. For those tiny moments I feel a sense of gratitude for what I have and those connections to life around me. The dog, the bees, the flowers, the crunching leaves.
Breathe.
"I would maintain that thanks are the highest form of thought, and that gratitude is happiness doubled by wonder" Gilbert K. Chesterton
It stabilises me, those simple things, I am then grounded and able to deal with the other stuff that fills the day, with an attitude of calm neutrality.
Focusing on things to be grateful for helps you to see life in a more positive light. It’s a way of training your brain to look for positives in each experience and helps to build a way of relating to the world that leaves you feeling content with your lot.
Counting your blessings - so to speak.
It doesn’t look to resolve your problems but engendering feelings of gratitude within your body can really help to reduce the unwanted effects of problems.
Luckily it’s a skill that you can learn through daily practice.
Here are some ideas you could try to get you started
Go for a walk outside, notice the weather, feel the sun, the rain, the wind on your face – you are feeling those sensations – Wow! Amazing! What a sensitive body you have – feeling all those weather sensations…
Are you run off your feet at work? Wow! Amazing! Look at what you are capable of…
Are you bored with nothing to do? Notice whether that feels comfortable to you or not and appreciate your insights
"If you don’t appreciate what you have, you may as well not have it" Rosalene Glickman
In any moment – ask yourself – what is the shimmer of wonder about this moment?
Try it for a few days – see if you notice anything different about yourself. Maybe you sleep better? Feel a little more calm? React slower to annoyances? Feel the softer sense of kindness about yourself?
So what next? Take stock.
What recent experiences are you thankful for?
Think about aspects of social distancing or social isolation that you will miss as restrictions are lifted.
What new things did you discover about yourself, your family or your neighbourhood?
What jobs did you finally give some time to and complete?
How did you manage to stay connected to your friends?
Did you learn a new skill? Read a new book? Try out something you have never tried before?
Which pieces of gratitude will you collect from your recent experiences to carry forwards with you into the weeks to come?
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