As Covid-19 lockdown restrictions begin to lift, are you finding that you’re not immediately feeling the euphoria that you imagined you would? It seems that for some, the very human trait of adaptability has well and truly kicked in and that a certain degree of comfort and acceptance has been established during the new routines of lockdown living.
Adapting to create new habits
Research from the University College London tells us that it takes on average 66 days to form a new habit and that habits generally form through repetition within a context, like, washing your hands after visiting the bathroom. It was a little over 66 days ago at the end of March that the first set of wide-ranging lockdown rules came into place in New South Wales, with a total international travel ban, home schooling, the closing of amusement parks, and eateries (except for takeaway) to name but a few. The enforcement of social distancing – remaining 1.5m away from another person (except those that you live with) has been with us weeks longer and with that came the sense of physical disconnection from each other. No more handshakes at the start of meetings, no more friendly hugs or kisses on cheeks. Not even a high 5.
We have adapted, been flexible, collaborated and adhered to guidelines and rules, we have thought of the community and the “collective good”. As tribal instinct has brought us together, we have been united in our desire to “flatten the curve” and think of our neighbours as we have sacrificed our personal wishes.
But now where do we stand?
There is a sense of returning to ‘normal’ but time has passed - more than enough time for new habits to have formed. If habits can be formed in 66 days, how long does it take to break them? How hard is it to break them? Do we want to break them?
When I talk about habits, I am referring to patterns of behaviour that we have become accustomed to. In the strictest definition, they might not be defined as habits, however I want to make the point that our behaviour and routines have changed to the extent that they might act like a habit. For example, when home schooling, the days may have started at a slower pace, with time for a family breakfast followed by a walk together. With children returning to the ‘normal’ daily drill, there may be a sense of loss of a routine we had adapted to as we grapple with a harsh break in a habit formed weeks ago.
We may have come to appreciate the benefits of working from home purely through the lack of commuting each day or wearing our favourite t-shirt and trackie-daks instead of a constricting suit or uniform. Having to embroil ourselves back into the stress of long delays on the road, queueing at the bus stop in the biting wind or worrying about whether there will be an available space for you on the train and the inevitable scramble and delay if not.
The stress of a new normal
Such shifts back to ‘normal’ might not be as easy as it seems as new habits may have developed over these lockdown weeks. So, returning to a different ‘normal’ may require extra effort as recently established habits are broken. The amount of stress, effort, discomfort and challenge that this might cause a person will vary, but is directly related to what the motivator is to change. It’s so much harder to break a habit that we enjoy! Getting back to ‘normal’ might not be the bliss we planned.
Instead we may experience a drain on our energy levels, feelings of panic may be generated where none existed before, we might find ourselves being quick to anger or less tolerant of others, we might feel physically unwell or unable to sleep. In fact, you might find yourself experiencing pretty much the same things as you did at the start of lockdown when the initial restrictions came into force!
“Motivation is what gets you started. Habit is what keeps you going.” Jim Rohn
If you find yourself experiencing emotions with a heightened intensity – that intimidating sense of overwhelm, then these grounding techniques might be useful for you to practice and offer you some comfort during this transition period.
5 exercises that calm you from the inside out
Taking just 2 minutes, these techniques can be performed almost anywhere and can help you to balance and restore feelings of calm. Focusing on 5 senses, you can pick a sense and direct deep attention to one of these exercises:
Sight. Take one really deep breath in, then exhale as slowly as you can. Focus your attention on an object that you can see clearly. Describe to yourself in as much detail as you can: what it’s made from, the texture, the colour, the shape, what it's use is, where it was made, how it was made.
Sound. Take one really deep breath in, then exhale as slowly as you can. Close your eyes (if you want to as this helps to heighten your hearing) and imagine the power of your hearing expanding and reaching out into the spaces around you. Focus your attention on noises occurring within your body, maybe a breath or a rumble. Then extend your awareness to the sounds from close by, in the room or space you are in. Broaden your focus to the sounds in the distance far away on the roads, in the air, in the spaces far away from where you are.
Smell. Take one really deep breath in, then exhale as slowly as you can. Take an item in your hand that you like the smell of. Maybe a food item, flower or leaf. Close your eyes (if you want to as this helps to heighten your sense of smell) and imagine the power of your nose expanding and reaching out onto what you are holding. Take a full inhalation of that thing. What do you smell? What memory is evoked? How does it make you feel? What image does it conjure in your mind’s eye? Take another inhalation and allow your mind to explore the memories and feel how the experience is received in your body.
Taste. Take one really deep breath in, then exhale as slowly as you can. Take a small item in your hand that you like the taste of. First focus on what it is, its shape, colour and texture. Notice how your mouth may be anticipating receiving this food. Your mouth may water in preparation. You may notice a tingling on your tongue. With great attention to the action, place the item on your tongue but do not chew. Leave the item resting on your tongue for a few seconds and notice what happens. Allow yourself to roll the item around in your mouth and experience the sensations of taste and texture as your body naturally reacts to the intake by wanting to chew and swallow. Then allow your body to follow the process naturally.
Touch. Find a place to sit and place your feet flat on the floor. Take one really deep breath in, then exhale as slowly as you can. Point your attention to the places your body touches the chair. Where is your back? Which parts of your legs are being supported? How is your weight distributed as you sit? Does a part of your body have more contact with the chair than another? Can you feel the chair with your hands? Does the surface of the chair feel rough or smooth? What texture can you feel? Does it feel hot or cold?
If you think you might need some extra support or know someone else who might need a helping hand adjusting to the new ‘normal’, you might want to consider contacting me for a free 15 minute consultation to find out how we might work together to ease the situation.
Until next time,
Emma
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